Finding, recognizing, and using your internal strengths with Pat Dougher - Coach, Author, Sage

Author, speaker (with Zig Ziglar), coach, marketing guru, and all-around great guy! Hear his journey of how to take negative life-events and turn them into positive high trajectory opportunities by learning about your internal motivations and strengths. See how he confronted his own limiting beliefs and how you can do the same to shift momentum and move forward in life and career!

This interview will inspire you to find your own strengths and how to use them! Pat has built a successful coaching practice helping business owner increase profits and build engagement for years. To get hold of Pat and learn about Strength Based Marketing, go to www.doersuccess.com or Patrick@DoerSuccess.com

The HR and Leadership Spotlight Show features Leaders - HR Professionals, Consultants, Coaches, Entrepreneurs, and Business Owners with a leadership message to share.

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Transcript

Chuck Simikian: 0:03

author, speaker, business coach, business owner, helping business owners increase profits through his strength based marketing platform. In fact, here's his book right here. And you can see right next to me is the man that is adept at not only increasing profits, but increasing engagement with both employees. And customers, ladies and gentlemen, Patrick Dewar. I was waiting for that. I was waiting for that.

Pat Dougher: 0:52

Thank you so much. Thanks. So my sound effects to help. Chuck, it's always a pleasure to be on the phone with you or on a video with you. You're brilliant marketer, you're specialists in HR, you create engagement in a massive way, even in a virtual world. Even having developed the course for that I'm so honored that I'm on with you.

Chuck Simikian: 1:16

Yeah, well, I gotta tell you, ladies and gentlemen, Patrick is the one that inspired me to bring the HR and leadership show to fruition and conduct these, these series of videocast and podcast interviews for So for that, Patrick, I do salute you. Cheers.

Pat Dougher: 1:36

Thank you so very much. And I'll bring out my father's no knows best because, hey, I have four kids sit now. Anyways,

Chuck Simikian: 1:45

talk to me about that mug. You did bring a mug for us today. Correct? Yeah, it's

Pat Dougher: 1:49

just the it's my favorite because my kids got it for me. And, you know, there was that day, when my oldest son walked up to me after basic shook my hand and said, Dad, I just want you to know that you were right. I was wrong. And I'm sorry. And my head exploded, I was sitting there thinking, Oh, my gosh, you know, when my son was 13, I'm convinced that he was visited in the night by a celestial being touched in the head. And given all knowledge and understanding because parental influence no longer had relevance in his life. And I'm pretty certain there's a lot of parents out there that are just like me. So when he said that, all I could think is oh my gosh, the mothership returned my son.

Chuck Simikian: 2:42

That's wonderful. And I cannot wait to hear how you do that same technique with customers and employees and help businesses affect that same change. But let's go ahead, talk to the to the audience today about who you are, and your journey.

Pat Dougher: 3:01

Thanks. I know we don't have a lot of time on this, it could probably take three days. And some you know, I could probably talk longer. And you could listen, let's just say that 20 years ago, I, I went through a life transformational process where I began to realize that there are negative tapes that hold us back. There are areas of our life where we don't process the hurts, and the pains, and they and they derail you. And and then there are parts of our lives, that if we would just tap into them, I call it your internal motivational gift or strength. That everything could be realized. Now the first time I saw that it was a little seven question test. And I thought it was a joke. And when are you for real? This is that. And it said that teaching was my internal motivational gift. And I I kid you not I looked at that and went No way. There's no way I'm not smart enough to teach. And then I thought, where's that coming from? And it's it. It was a seed. And I think all of us know there's seeds in our life that are planted. When somebody says something at a pivotal moment in our life. Well, first day of college, I sat down my academic advisor, and she said Mr. Dewar, do you realize that 99% of all of the rest of the freshmen are older placed above you? And all I could think is wow, I'm being called an idiot. So professionally, all my life nearly proved right, but I finally figured it out. Got a BS degree. It's not all bs Chuck. But the point is, is that after college, I never want to be called an idiot ever again. So I began to Learn how to read faster, remember more, and I studied accelerated learning that learn to read really fast. And remember whatever I want lists, presentation on notes names. And and, and so I was reading at least a book a week or better for a lot of years, probably 20 years when I thought, where's that coming from? And the one thing about these limiting beliefs or negative tapes, the solution is to confront them with the adult truth, not the child's truth. Now that may seem, you know, kind of soft skill, whatever. But the reality is, is that, how many times in our lives how many times in your life have you had that situation where you could have moved forward, but something inside you said, I'm not enough. And if you listen to it, you didn't take action. And the adult truth is, you've learned how to process information. Remember what you want, you've learned lessons, and it's no longer that child's mind in play. Your adult mind is what can shift everything. And so I remember, I sit there, and I thought, you know, if this gift is in me, then I'm going to start using it. And my life shifted. Within six months, I was being asked to speak around the Dallas Fort Worth area, I started teaching a three day event on, on how to find your purpose and your passion. I did it 13 times a year for over 10 years. And it opened up the door for me to move into professional speaking, business coaching, running mastermind groups for for million dollar plus businesses, and even opened the doors for me to do radio and TV and all kinds of stuff. And so, yeah, I look at that, and I go, what would it be like? If people could find that? Just their primary? site? We all have lots of gifts, and it's like the personality styles.

Unknown: 7:15

Mm hmm.

Pat Dougher: 7:16

Jackie, you know, as an HR person, how many different personality style tools Did you employ? In all the years that you were in HR?

Chuck Simikian: 7:26

Sure, I can think of the disc profiles communication style profile, which there's a billion different variations on that there's the official then there's people have built their own disc. There's the colors, there's the Myers Briggs, there's lions and

Pat Dougher: 7:43

tigers and bears, and

Chuck Simikian: 7:45

oh, my Exactly.

Pat Dougher: 7:49

I mean, that's what I saw. And even though they you know, they have all this stuff on strengths. And but the biggest mistake that everybody makes in those things is they they learn about kind of some characteristics in them. And I go, that's, that's one that's not the right way to use them. right way to use them, is to be able to read others. And what's nice about learning your gift is awesome. But can you recognize it? for 10 years, I ran this three day event, and I've run as a leader, all the organizations I've been a part of, I identify their gift, where they really get charged up that thing that you do that you never can get tired of identify it like that. And then I use that and I tap into that, and I tie the mission of the organization to their past.

Chuck Simikian: 8:49

Yeah, and so

Pat Dougher: 8:50

doing, it creates more engagement.

Chuck Simikian: 8:53

Now, that's, I love that model. So and that's why I wanted to have you on the show today. Because there's so much you have to offer. I mean, you've written, you've written a book, I said, you were an author. At some point, I'd love to have you back on the show to talk more about strength based marketing. But one of the things that did resonate with me was when we had the conversation on the gifts, and that's so true, once you know your gift, it creates more engagement, and did use the term more joy, more joy,

Pat Dougher: 9:30

more enjoyment, and in real passion, to be a part of the organization and to be to be able to fulfill the the mission of the of that company. I mean, that those are the things that I see if somebody if you can, it's it's like you want to put that switch in people. Because if you ever have you ever sat there and had that one person in your organization that every time you Get within eight feet of them, every muscle in your body locks. And inside of your head, you're screaming, if you would just get off your butt. You can be so good at this. You know what I'm talking about? Chuck?

Chuck Simikian: 10:15

Absolutely, absolutely. And you've been really good as a folks, Patrick is a business coach, and he can bring this, this model to you. And I was hoping you could just share for our audience, just a taste of that. Because you know, that would be amazing. Thank you. Thank

Pat Dougher: 10:33

you. Thank you, I was the one thing I was really hoping to be able to do. So I'm going to take the helm, so to speak. And this is the this is the test that I was talking about, you know, really finding your purpose. And the first decision you have to make on this little short seven question test is art. Are you a person that naturally in your life's history? Do you tend to be one that would rather work with your hands or speak with your mouth? If it's work with your hands, then what we're going to do is we're going to go down the hands out a lot of speakers just just hush for a second. And I'll get to you in a second. But the hands people, that's your natural. What you want to do is as you walk through this, you're just looking at, do you respond more to people's practical needs, or how they feel if it's, if it's how they feel you're going to put you're going to write down the number one and you're done, you can just wait a few minutes. And if it's people's practical needs, then would you rather help someone in need by doing something for them or giving them money? If it's doing, then you want to put your news show you put up number three down? If it's giving money, number four, and you're done and just pause for a second and then we'll we'll come back to you in a second. Okay, now, if you're a person that likes to be with their mouth, or more expressive than to form an opinion about something, would you probably go by what you feel or believe already, or research it until you're confident if it's research it, then put down right now number two, and if it's fly by the seat of your pants, so to speak in giving advice? Do you give practical steps of action or quota a references a basis for action? If it's quote something, write down? Number Five? If it's good practical steps of action, do you find that you adapt easily to any situation, or get frustrated with red tape and delays? adapting number six, get frustrated number seven, and then that's it. That's the test. You should have exactly one number in front of you. Only one number, because we're looking for that biggest part of you. We all have some of these things. Now let me show you what the numbers really stand for. And they stand for these internal motivational gifts like Mercy is number one, two is teaching three serving for giving five professing six exhortation and seven administration. Awesome. Yeah. If you if you have the number one, that that gift of mercy to teaching, serving straight through I was number two, teaching. I know, Chuck you were number six, exploitation, big time and it makes total sense. Especially when you look at and I'm going to fly through these pretty pretty quickly. So all I'm going to do is go key points of mercy. Always looking for the good and people. High empathy. Always feeling that that emotional stress around you. Teaching presents the truth in a logical systematic way loves to study and do research tends to neglect the practical application. Sometimes we know what to do we know Do we know to do so. Service. It's kind of like a mercy with feet. Because you see what needs to take place and you move towards it. You see the socks on the floor. You see that piece of something that's out of order you just go and fix it. You you ever need to feel appreciated, but you don't want somebody to like give a ticker tape parade for you. When you look at giving these are that number four was giving and It's amazing, they really understand that process of seed time and harvest so many times they're really good at business. And they're really good at understanding how to attract the resources that are needed. I mean, they're amazing of walk up to you and go a chuck. It's a Betty's birthday next week, give me two bucks and the holder handout in front of you just going it's crazy. And, and believe me, I've had that person in front of me and I had two bucks in there and going, I didn't like Betty at that point, you know, whenever. So professing is someone who speaks the truth. A lot of times, even when you don't want it, they'll tell you how the cow ate the cabbage. You know, they just straight there's black and white on off, right? Wrong. That's it. very outspoken. exhortation loves to encourage others. Check how many times in your life you said, you know, if I can do it, you can do it. And believe you. It's amazing that cheerleader, that person that is always out to set others free. And then administration, it's amazing. These people bring order to chaos, they see what's going on, they bring order just by bringing the resource together, making those things so and and getting things done in a way that me that is very systematic. The the most amazing thing about these is that when you understand what that gift is, I want to take it to another level. And it has to do with one day I realized I had heard this, this story about these, these three guys, Bill bright, Francis Schaefer and Orrin Cunningham, they got together and and one had an idea of mountains of influence to change a culture and other head pillars. And then, you know, the third one was was like, stones or something. My point though is, is that I've found that they there are these guys realized that there were seven or mountains or pillars of influence to change a culture, whether it's religion, family, education, media, arts, entertainment, government, and business. Well, then, some my friends, and I started looking at this and we went, Wow, isn't it interesting that mercy and family are so connected between education, serving arts and entertainment, giving business, professing media, they're supposed to tell the truth, exploitation, I say the word religion, but I want to encourage you to sub two that was spiritual. That's that, that in that enthusiasm, which that's a Latin word that breaks down to to fill with a spirit with the Spirit. And so don't get hung up on religion. It's not about rain. I

Chuck Simikian: 18:20

get it, though. That makes sense.

Pat Dougher: 18:21

Yeah. And then administration, government, da, well, then when you look at these different areas, I think, wouldn't it be cool if somebody has high mercy, think of where's the family that you that you work with. Now, it doesn't necessarily mean your own personal family, it could mean the family and your workplace, and how that Mercy is engaging those people or your customers and how you feel what's going on. And you can help them solve their problems, teaching, any form of training. If you're if you're really good at research, and you can bring it in, and then you can translate it inside so that other people can hear it. Then be engaged in that you work with your clients that way you work with your team that way. Now, arts and entertainment there. It's amazing how many different areas. This goes into one of my good friends, a guy named Rob skiba, who is a movie maker arts and entertainment and and he is making movies that are about what's in his heart and what he wants to what's one spring out. Give her business. I've seen amazing business people. There's one one of my friends in this area guy named Saul David amazing businessman and he is a huge giver, and attracts the resources that are necessary for whatever they're doing. Brilliant, amazing. So you can see media exploitation, these the things that if we tapped into and attached, where they get their charge, yeah, to the mission of the organization. Now, all of a sudden, massive results in everything that that people are they are trying to achieve. So with that, I'll, I'll flip the screen back over to you. And say, you know, I hope you got something out of that, because it's just about that, that really finding that passion? Yeah.

Chuck Simikian: 20:46

So let me just tell you a few things that I like about that. It's simple. That is a very simple questionnaire. It is a very simple model. If once I understand my, my core strength, my core value, my core gift, and how, as a business owner, would I take that? and roll it out to my team? And then what do we do with it afterwards? And is that something that you can help facilitate? Yeah,

Pat Dougher: 21:30

it's, once we understand Rs, that's good, it's better to know, all seven, and be able to read it in people. Because for for over 10 years, I saw how powerful that was running the three day event, we're out of 18 trainers in an event. And I get pretty good at reading what somebody is, that shows up, it's like personality styles, but only, it's where they're what they're designed to really be a part of. And so I would just, I would create teams that we're really synergetic is synergistic in every way. And then I would assign tasks based on their gifts, I'm not going to take mercy necessarily, and put them in a speaking role, unless they've practiced and, and really kind of raised that giftie up. But I might take a teacher like that, an administrator, you know, I'll use them in that area, because they're good at communication. If I need somebody that is really good for morale, I'm gonna find that expectation, right, and put them in some key areas of influence.

Chuck Simikian: 22:48

Right. And they're not only good at it, but it's their passion. So, you know, people say, Well, I'm, you're really good at that. Yeah, but I don't really like doing that. Okay. But this is, they're good at it. And they enjoy it. And when you can identify that and what's that term, you always use? connect the Connect your passion, to your creates movement with

Pat Dougher: 23:18

connecting, I just say, you know, you always want to connect your, your passion, with your profession. Yes. And what's really nice is if you can connect your purpose and your passion with your profession, then you do what you love to do. And get paid for

Chuck Simikian: 23:42

an invoice. Right? That's awesome. You know, the exciting thing is, I feel like that's what I'm doing now. Now that I've gone out as a HR consultant, HR coach, trainer, Speaker, I absolutely love doing that. I love doing these interviews. And folks, I said, Patrick is the one that's inspired me. He's been a friend. He's been a coach. You're my muse. Me, yeah, you complete me, Patrick. So. So with that all being said, you know, we're getting short on our time. And you have so much more to share. I would love to have you back on the show in a few weeks to talk more about what you have to offer. But let's talk about now if people want to get in touch with you. Now, how could they do that? And what would the experience be like? Well, thank

Pat Dougher: 24:37

you. And actually, the easiest way to do it is we've got this this group called strength based marketing on Facebook, you can join that. Another way that I think is far, far more useful, is send me an email. Okay. And it is I'm going to give you the simple Email. And then I'll tell you my website afterwards, the simple email goes like this. Patrick Ba, T, ri ck at D O E R, which is the way you pronounce my last name, do we are like do or like get her done, do we our success as you ccss.com Patrick at doober success.com, boom, and just send me in, send me a note, maybe if you want to see the test, I'll shoot you the PDFs. And if you want to learn more, let's start a dialogue. The other thing you can do is go out to it, this is a little longer. So you're gonna have to write this down as do we are Dewar and then one zero, like 10, and then k like 4000, do er, 10k, one 0k business strategies with all the SS and they'll be business strategies, calm duer 10k business strategies.com. And there are four videos out there that are all on lead generation marketing, best practices, and and I even have an email for that which is Patrick at Dewar 10k business strategies, which you connect me they kind of all came to come to the same computer. But my my purpose in that is to try to say there's value in my book is on Amazon, but if you're interested in it, just send me a note. And what I'll do is I'll, I'll sign a copy for you, I got a few here. And, and you know, sending an invoice for 20 bucks, 20 bucks. And what I'll do is I'll actually include my second book that I was in this year, which was actually a What do they call it a comp, like several different authors. compilation, as a compilation, there's an anthology, anthology Anthology, and this was a success for us to be that I was in but my point is awesome. Both of them do for 20 bucks. Normally, those are the more I it's not about the money. It's it's ideas are what creates success. My mentor used to say, if you want to change what you are, and where you are, you have to change it goes into your mind from this point. And the guy that said that's no longer with us, his name was Zig Ziglar. And, and I got to work with Zig is one of the speakers he's a pair you got to rinse repeat enough on anything to get past the conscious mind into the unconscious mind. Because lasting change comes from the unconscious mind. I so agree with that. So I appreciate you asking that. Chuck. Thank you so very much. Yeah,

Chuck Simikian: 27:47

Patrick. Fantastic. You know, ladies and gentlemen, Patrick Dewar, author, business coach, keynote speaker. I have been working with Patrick to help me out with my own direction and business. Get HR help. now.com is my website. If you need HR help, come see me. Leadership, business coaching, core strength, core gifting? Check out Patrick stuff, check out strength based marketing on Facebook. Patrick, thanks for being here today.

Pat Dougher: 28:25

Chuck, always an honor. Thank you.